KUALA LUMPUR: Mary (not her real name) was punched, kicked and not allowed to speak to her neighbours or make phone calls for years by her husband.

"He even beat me when I was pregnant with my first child. I had to endure the pain because of my two children, and I was financially dependent on him," she said.

Mary was a housewife while her husband was a lawyer.

Mary's plight worsened when her husband's family members started beating her. One day, she was chased out of the house by her in-laws. Her two children, then aged 10 and 12, were barred from seeing her.

Mary has not seen her children since and believes that they are now in their 20s. She and her husband are divorced.

What is unsettling is that police statistics show that such abuse cases are on the rise.

Federal Criminal Investigation Department director Datuk Bakri Zinin said the number of domestic violence cases increased by 15 per cent last year with 3,756 incidents compared with 3,264 in 2006.

From January to November this year, police registered 3,445 cases compared with 3,407 in the same period last year.

"I'm sure these figures are just the tip of the iceberg. Many domestic violence cases are not reported.

"Most acts of violence not only go unpunished but are also tolerated in silence by the victims and the community," said Bakri at a forum titled "The Role of Police in Domestic Violence and Custody Disputes from the Syariah and Civil Perspectives -- Where Do We Draw the Line?" yesterday.

Some 194, or six per cent, of cases this year could not be prosecuted as the victims retracted their complaints.

"Some of the victims are financially dependent on their spouses. They are afraid of losing the family's breadwinner if their husband is sent to jail."

Bakri urged complainants to seek help and counselling at the Welfare Department before going to the police if their spouses verbally or emotionally abused them.

This is because police would only get involved in domestic conflicts if there was physical violence, he said.

A participant at the forum said police must play a more assertive role in handling domestic violence cases. She claimed that victims backed off because the authorities could not protect them.

Protect and Save the Children vice-president Vicky Alahakone said the police and the Welfare Department must play their roles effectively as victims did not get the support to end their torment.