The last words of the Singapore Armed Forces Doctor who was found dead in Australia last Tuesday have finally been revealed, reported Shin Min Daily News.
In the final note to his loved ones, one poignant point stood out - Captain(Dr) Allan Ooi, 28, had been deeply hurt by the woman he loved most.
He said: "Although I had a few flings, I only loved (and still love) one woman.
"This failed relationship has hurt me in many ways and has caused me to hurt others in return.
"I would like to apologise for the people I hurt.
"To my best friend - The betrayal you made was only that small. Why did we stop talking after that? I really do treasure the friendship that we have."
Dr Ooi, who was cremated yesterday, had e-mailed his last words to a select group of friends he cherished, reported the newspaper.
He had disappeared for months, including having gone AWOL (absent without official leave) from the army since October last year.
His note, which was sent on 12.29am on the day of his death, has been posted on several websites.
Apart from talking about his lost love, Dr Ooi also voiced his unhappiness at work.
He said: "I am not depressed, and never have been. I was, however, intensely unhappy at the point of my departure from home, family and friends.
"My job was terrible - no joy, no satisfaction, 10-14 hours a day of nothing. A prison. One of my own forging, perhaps, by signing a contract with SAF at the age of 18."
In his closing words on the note, Dr Ooi said that his suicide was one of the solutions to his pain.
He said: "Maybe my (suicide) is a silly move, but I think that this is one solution.
"I do not believe in reincarnation or God, death should be the final end point."
HELPLINES
Samaritans of Singapore (SOS): 1800-2214444
Singapore Association for Mental Health: 1800-2837019
