By Cheryl Chia

TELLING it like it is may not be the best way to get someone out of an embarrassing situation, such as having a bad case of body odour or having a shred of vegetable stuck between the teeth, grooming experts said.

In the light of the growing popularity of fmylife.com, a website which allows users to contribute stories about their red-faced moments, Singaporeans told my paper that there is no lack of such incidents here too.

Mr Jon Chong, 22, a full-time national serviceman, said having his fly down while he was on stage during a performance definitely ranked high on the list of most embarrassing moments in his life.

He told my paper: "There I was, all confident about myself and after the performance, my friend told me my fly had been open. She had noticed for quite a while, but forgot to tell me."

Ms Monica Chin, 30, a computer programmer, said: "I had this young boy on the train ask his mum, 'Why is this lady so smelly'" I was so horrified!" She added: "I think when you don't tell someone about things like that, it embarrasses them more in the end when they find out and realise that everyone had already noticed it."

However, Ms Agnes Koh, director of Etiquette and Image International, advised against telling it straight up.

"It is a form of respect to a stranger not to comment on these things. In countries such as those in North America, telling a stranger that his fly is open can constitute sexual harassment, as you shouldn't even be looking at that area. You are infringing upon his personal space by doing so," she said.

For potentially more embarrassing situations involving body odour or bad breath, being subtle like offering breath mints or complaining about the weather making you sweaty is the way to go.

Ms Koh said: "The trick is to encourage them (to be aware) in a diplomatic way. The goal of etiquette is to never be offensive."

ccher@sph.com.sg

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