Born to compare

COMPARING ourselves with others is ingrained in us.

Society exposes us to the terms of measurement and comparison we grow up with: 'gifted', 'elite', 'special', 'express', 'normal'.

When the reality of life hits home, those who grew up believing they are superior naturally feel threatened about where they stand. For them, comparing is self-affirming.

Yet in the Broadway musical Avenue Q, some characters proclaim how important it is for them to be inferior to others, thinking that they serve society in doing so. There is even a song in it that goes:

'The world needs people like you
and me Who've been knocked around by fate
'Cos when people see us, they don't want to be us,
And that makes them feel great.'

Comparing ourselves is a way of coping and we simply can't help it. But maybe we should compare objectively, and never forget to love ourselves.

Julian Wong, 19, is a full-time musician

Family pressure

TWO of the most hated words in my youth: Family reunion.

For many young people, a family reunion is but one of those occasions where you find yourself pitted against the cousin closest in age to yourself.

You find your aunt asking you to stand back to back, just to see who's slightly taller, or who lost their chubby cheeks this year.

Amid all those open comparisons, and sometimes even behind your backs, you find your parents competing for the 'smartest kid in the family' award.

All these little things certainly affected the way I grew up. I even needed to know my position in class for even a small matter such as spelling, just to have ammunition to compare.

Now, wouldn't it be easier on us kids if parents didn't pressure us like that?

Kenneth Goh, 19, is currently pursuing a diploma in interior architecture and design at Temasek Polytechnic

Know your enemy

CHINESE philosopher Sun Tzu once said: 'Know your enemy and know yourself.' Life is like a battleground where only the fittest survive.

We are brought up in an environment where being No. 1 is everything, and there are no points for second place.

Best airport, best airline, and the first to fly the Airbus 380 - where else does our competitive mindset come from?

From childhood, we vie with our siblings for our parents' attention, and then come scholastic challenges, followed by careers.

The Government's global village initiative encourages foreigners to join in the competition, and further intensifies our need to shine.

Yet, the irony is that competition is essential to remain at the cutting edge.

To stay ahead, we need to know our own capability, and understand where we stand in comparison to others.

One then realises that Sun Tzu's teachings from 1,500 years ago still remain relevant. It is a simple strategy to tackle life's challenges, and one many of us subscribe to.

Tabitha Mok, 21, is a third-year medical student at the University of Western Australia

Competition can get tiring

AUTHOR Richard Dawkins wrote this in his book, The Selfish Gene: 'To a survival machine, another survival machine of its own kind is an obstacle.'

This explains why there is competition among humans: We all want to survive.

But it can get tiring.

I used to cheer when I got a better exam score than someone, then get jealous over being beaten by another.

When friends asked how I fared, I always wondered why they posed the question, and whether they would laugh behind my back.

Such second-guessing dilutes friendships, and is mentally draining.

Rivalries can benefit in some ways, but only if the individual has the maturity to set his own goals and not succumb to hyper-competitiveness.

Otherwise, he will never find victory to be a sweet moment.

Berton Lim, 19, has a place to read business administration at the National University of Singapore (NUS)

Rethink education system

IN OUR quest to become an education hub, we seek to attract foreign students by offering them quality education and a chance to fulfil their potential.

Ultimately, the aim of education should be to produce dynamic, upright and confident individuals who value morality as much as their academic performance.

Is this what we want our students - both local and foreign - to get from their many years of education here: an over-competitive character? An unhealthy habit of comparing oneself with others? Insecurities which can be reassured only by knowing one's ranking in this ceaseless rat race?

Healthy competition can spur individuals to do better, but an overdose - as seen by the recent case in the news - can be a pitfall for some.

A good education system allows students to recognise their limitations, while capitalising on their strengths. Perhaps it is time for a rethink of the system.

Chew Zhi Wen, 20, has a place to read law and economics at NUS

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